After all...Tomorrow is another day

Bad day. The weather has turned cold and gray and with it my mood. Changing of the weather always makes me depressed. I had to wear shoes instead of flip flops today. The last remaining piece of summer gone. It's weird how things happen. Is friendship always fleeting? I've always wondered how people just "lose" contact. Now I know. People lose contact when someone comes to believe they are the most important person in the world. The ultimate selfish act right? You lose contact when you start thinking you don't need anyone anymore. But I still need you. I've always thought the girls who qualified themselves by the way they looked, how many guys they've fucked, how many people had them in their top friends on myspace were stupid. Now I pity them. How undesirable must your life be. To have to be perfect for a man. To be consumed with jealousy. To be insecure about your body. To have to go out every weekend to make sure you have friends. To blow every guy that gives you attention (your boyfriend's best friend?).To lose touch with your inner beauty so much you must spend enormous amounts of money on things to make yourself look more beautiful. To waste your mind reading Cosmo instead of looking at the world around you. What must your life be like? Empty. There is still hope for you. You just have to find it. Maybe it's too late for you and me. But I'll always care for you. I must find myself in all this. Who am I and where am I going? I still don't know. Maybe I never will. Sometimes I have this weight on my chest, crushing me and I feel like if I can't get out I'll suffocate. I need to go somewhere. Somewhere so I can breathe again. It's not here. And it's not there. Where is it?